Dreamin'

When I was younger I used to have all kinds of dreams.  I would dream I was a famous actor or singer receiving applauds and accolades for my spectacular performances.  I used to dream I was a renowned doctor sought after by many to save lives and administer healing.  I would dream I was a powerful business person wheeling and dealing; admired and respected for securing multi-million dollar deals.  I dreamed I was a talented writer touching my readers with my prose so that they couldn't wait to read my next masterpiece.

Yes, these were all fabulous dreams and all very different as to vocation and talent; however, the one thing these dreams all had in common was the recognition, the prestige, the acceptance I associated with them.  You see, my greatest dream was to be loved, accepted; noticed.  Don't get me wrong I grew up with two parents who I knew loved me and my siblings; this is not the kind of love I am talking about.  We all have a longing to fit, to matter, to feel approved.  This stems more from a natural internal void than from external things such as upbringing or home life or lack thereof.  This is the God-sized hole in each and every one of us that can only be filled by His presence in our lives.

Although I haven’t accomplished the dreams I had for myself as a child, (well, I like to think that writing is still an option) my dream of being loved completely was fulfilled the day I accepted Christ into my life.  In my surrender to him, he has instilled in me new dreams: to make him the center of my life and marriage; to have my children and their children live for Christ; to be used to share his message and touch others for his recognition and acceptance and not my own.

Oh, I still have dreams for my life, I still dream of being a writer; I am currently working toward my dream of completing my college education; and I dream of going to Paris.  The difference now is that these dreams, whether accomplished or not, do not define my self-worth, I have found my significance in Christ.

Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

(Psalm 37:4)